31. That’s the magic number. 31 blog posts separate the day my colon was removed with this night, July 8th, 2015. My Outback dinner will be the last meal to find a home in my bag. Tomorrow, at 7:30 AM. I will go under the knife for the second, and hopefully final time. This page post is a recap for all of you too lazy to read all 31 of those posts. I quickly glanced through them and it feels like a lifetime ago. I needed two friends to walk me up the stairs the first week home. Tonight I ran through the halls of the hotel to grab a drink at the vending machine. I haven’t had a stomach ache since before the surgery. I had two weeks of uncontrollable diarrhea, but besides that, this recovery was as smooth as it could have been. I don’t want to sugar coat it, it sucked, but there were only a few hiccups. Easily the worst thing I’ve had to go through. It was hard. Could I live the rest of my life with a colostomy bag if I had to? Yes. Would it be ideal? No. Do I want that? No. I would argue I’m as comfortable as I’d ever get with it. A lot of times it’s like it’s not even there. Working out and running are no problem. Especially with the stealth belt. I will draw a line though. I can’t imagine suiting up for a hockey game or getting tackled in a football game. I still was a bit paranoid when it made contact with things. Keep in mind it’s only been four months though. Maybe in time it’d get even better for me. That’s just my opinion based on my short experience with it. As for stealth belts, and stoma guards, and all those other belts and gadgets to help make it a more comfortable experience…my favorite- the belt the ostomy nurse gave me in the hospital. That was free! I’m not saying all those others don’t serve a purpose, they do! And maybe it’s just personal preference. But I wear that belt 24/7, unless I’m in the shower or wearing my stealth belt. It just clips to the flange and keeps it up and sturdy. When the bag gets full you can tell and without anything it is super uncomfortable. Drinking a lot quickly filled my bag up quick with watery stool. This is no fun. Avoid diarrhea at all costs. It will cause leaks and multiple bathroom trips and will make your life a living hell. I emptied 4 times in one hour at my worst. That was before I was taking Imodium consistently. Now I don’t even need Imodium and I’m fine. Sleeping with diarrhea is the easiest way to get leaks. All of it sits at the top around the stoma and because there’s only one place to go, it tries to squeeze out through the barrier and it always wins. Get some kind of absorb gel packs you can put in your bag to thicken stool when you’re going through that too, it’s a life saver! As for eating. I say, the sky’s the limit. Some things will cause diarrhea of course, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy something you love. Maybe you have a craving for some Taco Bell. Go for it! It’s like every other human. It may not agree with you, but it’ll pass and you’ll be fine. I wouldn’t get into a habit of fast food for every meal, but treat yourself sometimes. Drink fluids too. Especially if the consistency is getting looser. It’s super important. Emptying the bag is no problem at all anymore. Changing it used to take an hour. I passed out the second time! HA. Jeez. I can’t even believe that. Now it’s nothing. My friend told me last night that everything was going to be fine, that I had this, “in the bag.” (She’s clever, I know) I think I believe her. I think things are going to be fine. Today I can honestly say that from a health perspective, I am happy. You wouldn’t catch me saying that the past 10 years of my life. So for that, it’s a no brainer that I made the right move. The only way to move now is forward. I didn’t have a choice last time before surgery. It had to happen. Now I do. I am walking myself into the hospital and having them perform another 5 hour surgery. They will create a system so that I can go to the bathroom again, normally. It’s really incredible really. I will undoubtedly go through the same awful recovery process. It will be hard. Worse than the first time so I hear. Sure, I’m afraid. Without a guarantee, it’s easy for your mind to wander. If some serious pain for a few months is all I have to endure for a lifetime of good health, no one would say no to that. So, with Osty by my side (if he forgives me for forgetting him in the car tonight) I will stroll through the hospital doors (half asleep) and get this underway. Lying here letting my mind wander will be the death of me. One minute I’m fine. The next, terrified.   Thanks to all of you for continuing to read and keep up with each post.  It helped get me through this crap time in my life and I mean that. I never wrote much or went to school to be a writer, but it certainly is cathartic. I’ll continue the blog posts after the surgery. I’ll see you on the other side!